New Player struggling with balance of chasing DPS and defence (Bane Occultist)

I'm a new player to the game and I've managed to get to red maps with decent DPS but not so great defenses. I started shifting my passive tree points and although my defense got a bit better I've hit a hard brick wall in Tier 14 maps (I also REALLLY struggled with the Cauldron witch in Burial Chambers T9).

Biggest issues for me looks to be physical damage, especially enemies who chase and hit quickly or bonk hard. I'm looking at chasing "convert phys to cold/fire/chaos", life regen and more evasion. My DPS is currently not great and at under 100k I'm wondering how I can get the multi million numbers people mention when I'm looking to spec more into D on my passive tree.

Any tips from experience players?

What's the best way to share my build so that others can have a look?